The Best Thing on the Internet Is Still Tim Urban’s ‘Wait but Why’
6 of his posts changed my perspective on life forever
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Before there was Tim Denning, there was Tim Urban.
His blog Wait But Why exploded in 2013, filled with stick figure illustrations depicting universal themes that speak to us all, like friendships, happiness, and social acceptance.
As it turns out, his musings are the epitome of evergreen. 8 years is a long time in Internet World, but his posts are still as fresh as a daisy. I re-stumbled across the site recently whilst I was doing some research for another post and I spent a merry hour laughing and nodding my way through the site.
There are 6 posts in particular that seriously changed my perspective on life when I first read them many years ago. They helped me become who I am today.
If you’ve not read these yet, maybe they can do the same for you.
1. Why Generation Y Yuppies Are Unhappy
What it’s about
The quintessential Millennial struggle of reality versus expectations. Our parents had it better than our grandparents and in turn, they had us believe we would have it even better. But, as every Millennial on this planet knows, it didn’t quite turn out like that.
Add in the ‘taunting’ of image crafting — every Millennial thinks they’re doing terribly compared to their peers’ Instagram grid of dreams — and you have one unhappy generation.
Why it’s still relevant today
When I read this post sometime around 2015, it was a eureka moment. Oh, so THAT’S why I have a gnawing sense of dread in the pit of my stomach every day, it’s because my reality can’t catch up with my insanely high expectations.
Tim talks about Facebook image crafting, now it’s TikTok and Instagram. The platforms may have changed but the point stays the same. In 2018, 70% of people claimed they were jealous at least once a month about something they saw on social media. And who would like to bet the percentage has grown since then?
Millennials are still hounded by their parents’ desires for them to reach the heights they did, complete with house, marriage, kids, and a great career before the time they’re 30. And social media continues to make our lives a misery.
Frankly, nothing much has changed, which is why this post still holds up strong today.
2. Taming the Mammoth: Why You Should Stop Caring What Other People Think
What it’s about
A look into why we care so much about what people think of us, which largely stems from our evolutionary need to be accepted as part of a tribe, back when that shit was super important.
Humans evolved an over-the-top obsession with what others thought of them — a craving for social approval and admiration, and a paralyzing fear of being disliked. Let’s call that obsession a human’s Social Survival Mammoth.
Why it’s still relevant today
Aw man, where do you start.
My paralyzing fear of being liked has plagued me since I was a kid. I still spend a worrying amount of time wondering if people like me, regardless of if I like them or not.
Hands up who feels the same. Hands up whose therapy sessions are basically your shrink repeating over and over: why do you care so much about what other people are doing?
This is an issue grappled with by every single person in the world. For most people, taming the Social Survival Mammoth is a lifetime exercise. It got a hell of a lot easier for me once I’d read this post. Suddenly, I understood why I cared; it wasn’t just me being a weirdo, it is simply part of my (and your) evolutionary makeup.
3. Life is a picture but you live in a pixel
What it’s about
We tend to picture our lives in broad brush strokes, assuming that our future is where our pot of happiness gold lies. If you get the house, the car, the job, the great career, then you’ll be happy.
In reality, we only ever live one day at a time. Sometimes, amazing things happen and we expect the feeling to last forever. The day we get a promotion for instance. But eventually, we become accustomed to our new way of life and our Wednesdays are mundane again. It’s a never-ending cycle of chasing the Next Big Thing.
Why it’s still relevant today
This was me.
Every day.
For most of my adult life.
I thought I’d be happy once I got the job, the marriage, the house. And I was, for a while, until I got bored and looked for the next big shiny thing to distract me.
I’ll put good money on the fact that you know that feeling too.
Reading Tim’s post back in the day really helped me to understand that happiness and contentment would never be within my reach if I didn’t make my peace with mundane Wednesdays, something I didn’t even begin to do until my mid-thirties.
4. 10 Types of Odd Friendships You’re Probably Part Of
What it’s about
A breakdown of how we develop and maintain friendships, and the strange ones that make no sense that we collect along the way.
Why it’s still relevant today
I remember reading this particular post when some of my older friendships were in a state of flux. I thought I was alone in feeling like a failure, like everyone else had their friendships sorted.
Yeah so turns out, I most definitely wasn’t alone.
We all have friendships that make us wonder why the hell we still bother. Like the historical friend who, if you had not been friends since you were in diapers, would definitely not be in your life. Or the friend who was once on the same road as you but is now on a completely different life path.
The post is a perfect reminder that although many friendships feel odd or complicated, the chances are everyone else in the room has gone through a similar experience with their own friendships.
Because strange friendships are a cornerstone of life.
5. How to Name a Baby
What it’s about
A deep dive into the data behind naming trends through the years. Why do we name our kids what we do? How do we decide? Why do some names stand the test of time and some die an almost instant death?
Why it’s still relevant today
Baby naming is a little slice of social history. We all know someone who named their kid something like Prudence because it was the name of their grandmother, despite it being a bit of a weird name for a 3-year-old.
Names also speak to our human nature. We are social beings and we love being bound together by something, anything, even what we call ourselves.
When Tim talks about the different options parents have when it comes to baby naming, you can see yourself in one of those options. And if you follow his link to the baby naming wizard, you can waste 3 hours searching for your name and the name of every other person you know.
6. Why Procrastinators Procrastinate
What it’s about
A look into why procrastinators simply can’t buckle down and concentrate thanks to an Instant Gratification Monkey, the Dark Playground, and a Panic Monster.
Why it’s still relevant today
Because procrastination still plagues even the best of us. It’s why I didn’t start work until 12.30 pm today. It’s why this post has taken me 2 hours longer to write than it should.
You don’t even have to be much of a procrastinator to know the feeling because it’s a universal topic.
As it turns out, Tim is such an expert on the subject, it was the subject of his TED talk, which he documents on another post that had me quietly shaking with laughter in my super-quiet coworking space just now.
Wait But Why is personal development at its finest. Long may it continue.
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